Why Bother Letting Go?
Although I know that I am not the blessed controller of all things, sometimes I have the tendency to forget. And when I do cease to remember, others who love me, kindly remind me.
My husband is usually the first to notice my amped-up attitude and gives me the “look” that sends the unmistakable message to calm down. When friends notice my exhilarated frustration over a particular set of circumstances which are out of my realm of control, they offer kind, but very concise words of truth, “there is really nothing you can do.” And if I miss those cues from the people who care about me and continue to believe in my imagined powers, my body reminds me. In order to sleep, it tells me that I will have to remember how to turn off the overdrive button located somewhere in my brain.
The Strength to Let Go
Though it may feel counter intuitive, it takes more backbone to stand down from our attempts to manipulate, control or alter another person’s thoughts. We might believe we know what is “best” for them, and even plead for them to alter the course they’ve chosen for their life, but even our best ideas are truly only a guess. We are not omniscient which is a difficult truth for some of us, like me, to believe.
But, when I finally accept the reality of my limited amount of control in someone else’s life, then the possibilities for them and for me become limitless. Our lives are not set in concrete and as long as we are alive there is always hope for change. Even though I cannot predict the timeline for a desired change to take place, I can carry the hope that someday there will be change.
Letting go in order to allow someone to live with their choices is not the same as disregarding them. Letting go and still respecting them as a person is a personal process for us as is learning how to live their lives well is a process for them.
Yes, I’d like it if some people would shape-up, but I’m not in charge of their shaping. I can encourage, inspire, be a living example, and offer advice when asked, but it is not my duty to be in command of another person’s life.
Why bother to let go? Letting go frees us to acquiesce to our present reality that we are not the blessed controller of all things, but we also know that Someone else is.